Post by haltnotsquare on Nov 21, 2008 9:40:33 GMT
Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don't pick it up straight away. Instead, shout, "Get Off, IDIOT! GET OFF!"
Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "relaxing into the fall." Roll into a ball and spring lithely to your feet.
Learn to grab your cheque book and write out a £200 check without even looking down.
Jog long distances carrying a halter and a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbours what you are doing - they might as well know now.
Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train and practice pulling to a halt. Smile as if you are having fun.
Hone your fibbing skills: "See, moving hay bales is FUN!" and, "No, really, I'm glad YOUR LUCKY PERFORMANCE and multi-million pound horse won the class. I am just thankful that MY HARD WORK and actual ability won me second place."
Practice dialling your chiropractor's number with both arms paralyzed to the shoulder and one foot anchoring the lead rope of a frisky horse.
Borrow the slogan: Be All That You Can Be - bitten, thrown, kicked, slimed, trampled, frozen . . .
Lie face down in a puddle of mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself, "This is a learning experience. This is a learning experience. This is . . ."
And the Number One Exercise to Become a Better Equestrian: Remember, its never the horse's fault...
;D
Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "relaxing into the fall." Roll into a ball and spring lithely to your feet.
Learn to grab your cheque book and write out a £200 check without even looking down.
Jog long distances carrying a halter and a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbours what you are doing - they might as well know now.
Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train and practice pulling to a halt. Smile as if you are having fun.
Hone your fibbing skills: "See, moving hay bales is FUN!" and, "No, really, I'm glad YOUR LUCKY PERFORMANCE and multi-million pound horse won the class. I am just thankful that MY HARD WORK and actual ability won me second place."
Practice dialling your chiropractor's number with both arms paralyzed to the shoulder and one foot anchoring the lead rope of a frisky horse.
Borrow the slogan: Be All That You Can Be - bitten, thrown, kicked, slimed, trampled, frozen . . .
Lie face down in a puddle of mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself, "This is a learning experience. This is a learning experience. This is . . ."
And the Number One Exercise to Become a Better Equestrian: Remember, its never the horse's fault...
;D
ket
